The Evil Bucket of Unreasonable Brainrot

I can't breathe with these lungs. I can't feel in this skin. I'm not safe in my body. (God is coming for me.)

It's still hard to talk to people who are easy to be around. What do I want? I thought it was friends, maybe it's something else. He laughed when I said I needed a method in order to make friends (I don't blame him, I try not to appear broken)

I decided to not feel guilty about being white. That's bullshit. Most people are not slave owners and had nothing to do with it. Blaming/punishing the children is illogical and racist.

"Daily Exercises to Reduce Your Whiteness," by Bitchslayer Judas
"Various Nursery Rhymes (For Adults with Dementia)," also by Bitchslayer Judas
Agent: "Ahem, let me read a sample; 'Poppycock Polyglot, Popping glocks and coke and cock,' you CANNOT put this in a kids book!"
BJ: "Why not, it's funny..."
Coming Soon, "How I Got Dicked Down By 237 Men: A Memoir"

Interlude Track for an album, read in 2D or Murdoc's voice) Ah yes, that was quite nice, orgasmic even. Apologies for the interruption, but our lead singer's currently coked out of his fucking mind. Please enjoy this elevator music instead.

Morose Monday. Turbulent Tuesday. Whomping Wednesday. Theoretical Thursday. Friccassee Friday. Dastardly Saturday. Soothing Sunday.

My vote for most date-able fictional woman would go to Kim Pine from Scott Pilgrim or Tsugumi from Nisekoi. They're criminally undervalued. Collette from Ratatouille would cut your nuts off. And Mai and Zuko, or Astrid and Hiccup, have the holy fictional relationships. IDK, this belongs in the shit bucket man.

"Was this what you meant by 'blue-haired liberal?'" *Ramona Flowers*

You can escape destiny, but you can't escape yourself.

I'm not sleeping, I'm practicing being dead. In fact, I've gotten quite good at it. I really hope to be a professional dead person.

GladOS="Do you want to do some SCIENCE?" FROZEN cover.
Or maybe bake a caaaaake
we can get your companion cube
and neurotoxin
THAT WAS A JOKE HA HA HA HA HA

We don't think like they do
Don't play with straight lines, they don't fit you.

Waffle House is the modern-day diner, and McDonalds is the foreign version of an American Breakfast. Now I know how the foreigners feel about misrepresentation in cuisine.

Yeah, I multiclassed into Redneck/Goth

A dub is a dub is a dub is a dub is a dub is a dub. Come on man, for the squad? For the SQUAD?!

I am a nuclear reactor with ZERO WATER.

Do you think the fae can dance like michael jackson? But like, mixed with an Irish jig? Can they... crip walk?

The gravemind has absorbed every hentai and r34 artist. Truly terrifying. Well actually that's just AI isn't it?

"Who would rather go to a funeral than have sex?" I say, while eating a fundraiser chicken mcnugget meal in a gray mall somewhere in the flooded bayou. I am also a magnificent gothic tall lady who rode a funereal boat here. Riding on a boat past buildings, a funeral in the swamp. A building of red and dark rooms, an abandoned speakeasy with an impenetrable layout. Harpoon dancing. Lesbian lovers, hermaphrodite picasso kiss, separating into androgynous twin ladies in black. A dog's litter, noone watched, the last two were stillborn, she turns into a pale human mother with her hands over her face, an apocalyptic pose over two bloody strangled fetuses.

None of you are on my level of dark (chocolate) humour.

So much for the apple, you bit off more than you could chew. Now die on your poison. Age, disease, and violence fled Pandora's Box, and all you got in exchange was hope. So I hope you choke. Die on your poison, fool.

My carcass shell is flaky and heavy. Depression Breakfast.

You ever look at a person and wonder what the hell is going on in their head? Yeah, that's me, I don't know either.

Mall Doll vs. Thrift Whore

Sand is the glitter of the universe. Aha, now you have sand in your clothes, see what I mean? I saw this in my notebook and immediately hated myself.

Nihilism is Depression as a philosophy. "Nothing really matters..." *snaps* "Good shit, write that down."

They say great kids' media appeals to adults and kids. So who among you is reading the Cat in the Hat?

Never lose your inner child. They're a pain in the ass to find and it could be considered child neglect.

"Family-Sized" is a lie, they know damn well you're not feeding a family.

They closed the 99 cent store in my town, so I had to go to the Dollar Store. It was this whole thing, and by thing I mean penny (and a quarter).

The English invented the double decker bus so twice as many tourists could see gray ass London.

Who the hell named them Gen Alpha? We really don't need that...

Tired of being emotionally exhausted. Time to be mentally deviant.

The skeletons stay in my closet. That's where I keep the cry wine.

It's a good thing people can't take a joke anymore. "Hey man, you hear about tha--" Ah, fuck! He took my joke! Not cool, man. (read in Mitch Hedburg voice)

How did the English fit an entire breakfast in a tea packet?!?

Paid artists, like paid actors,
Strut along a stage made by broken hands.

Gir's Doom song, DOOM Eternal version.

Do you understand how destructive giant chickens would be? They'd peck you in half and consume your body, and then it'd be ground the bits with the boulders in their gizzard.

Nothing Else Matters is my disney princess song.

Welcome to the UwUnited States. :3.

Every genius needs an evil twin.

The Law of Depression and Ice Cream: No matter how big the tub is, Depression will increase to meet the supply of Ice Cream.

So are the TMNT furries?

Aperture Kitchens: Working Hard to Improve Food.

Sarcasm Indicator*: For when your tone-deaf unfunny "friends" are unable to realize it's a joke.*